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Seriously

by Kaitlyn Bethel

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1.
Seriously 03:39
I take myself too seriously Got me feeling so deliriously I guess they don't care about the food I eat I guess there's still ground up underneath my feet I guess they don't care about the clothes that I wear I guess that all of this is the result of fear I gotta take it easy Or keep waiting for the rest of my life For the courage to go on and on and on Into the dark of this night I gotta take it easy Or keep waiting for the rest of my life Is it worth it to go on and on and on Until I get it right (Until I get it right) This is the place where heaven meets earth This is the place where everything hurts I get knocked off this pedestal of mine Just to learn the basics for the umpteenth time I wonder if they realize that I'm not so tough Would I be a better person if my brain shut off?
2.
He's A Dog 03:50
He's somewhere else tonight Playing a game that he can win He only starts What he can end And he won't come back until There's another button he can push No he won't come back until My resistance is a bowl of mush He's a dog He's howling at the moon tonight He's a dog He makes the wrongest things feel right And I'm more mad at me than I'm ever gonna be with him But he's a dog No she didn't love him It was all in her head He says all the right things Just because he can And he won't come back until Every single card is in his hands He'll choose to be a boy because It's so much harder to be a man
3.
I'd say it's me against the world It's just I don't understand How an inanimate object Could make a mess of my plans I've always wondered Could there be another Maybe eight feet under All the stress and the weariness No I'm not cool with this So this is bliss? Ignorance I smile and I wave at the crowd Like I'm benevolent And selling it What they do to me has always been so irrelevant I know how to behave And strange—the way Can't even say your name I'm a storyteller, tell myself that it was just a phase For days Don't worry, I know that I'm a mess Bet you didn't think a girl like me Could rap like this And it's hard Hard the way I'm losing faith And it's cold Cold the way I hand out blame She called my bluff It's not good for my health I'm up against myself They brew my tea As strong as poison these days Sometimes it's the only thing That's keeping me awake But it's not the only poison That I'm letting in my body It's not the only label I won't let them put on me Beyond me How this bitterness took root Decided I'd be different But I didn't think it through Didn't notice That I was looking right at the proof Every time I checked the mirror And I said that it was you I'm through Don't wanna grow up to be a ghosts If I stumbled through the wardrobe Would I find the lamppost? Or just an empty interior? The greatest enemy is always so familiar BRIDGE I guess I'll be needing a room with a view I don't want hipster, only Holden approved Do I need a change of scenery or just a change of heart? When did my negativity become a work of art? It's hard, I know, I've said it all before They say that I'm intelligent but school is just a bore Do I stay here in the suburbs or try a different scene? So many years behind a desk but I don't know anything
4.
We broke our rules Against the stone That we carved them into You kissed my mouth And we were told That it wasn't the thing to do We're falling from high ledges This cornerstone has its sharp edges It's the shine on her lips The sway of her hips The way you fall in love The way you say "goodnight" Oh moses... couldn't I? Tell me Which is worse To love too much or not at all If it's Either or I'll take the love and take the fall This land comes with a promise Why wander while we're on it? BRIDGE And they can waste their lives With their hearts as cold as ice Making sure they don't have any fun Well they can wait until they're dead But that's over my head I wanna live while I'm young
5.
Lock & Key 03:00
Lived in the dark The angels taught me how to roar Got lost inside A cause worth fighting for I grew up in the night time Always on the run But they never really knew my strength No they never really knew my strength Father dear I will confess my sins We can talk about All the wrong I did I grew up on the dark side I never saw the light And I never really knew my strength No I never really knew my strength I've got it under lock and key No they never really knew bout me Took me in and they raised me right But they never really knew my strength Oh I'm full of possibilities I prowl beneath the raging seas Took me in and they raised me right But they never really knew my strength Lion heart Beneath a white sheep skin I love the hunt Like I hate my sin Got lost in the static Everybody did the same It was darker when the lights came on Oh it was darker when the lights came on BRIDGE I wanted more More than a cause I wanted more Than a worthy facade I wanted more More than a cause You want more And they tear you apart

about

About a year ago I started working with my very talented friend Locke Brady on a small musical project. We planned on recording three songs at Night Owl Studios, which then turned into four songs, which then turned into five. I wrote most of the lyrics, sang lead vocals, and played the guitar once; Locke did pretty much everything else and deserves a trophy for all the hard work he put into this. This tiny album is our finished product and I'm so happy and proud that my heart could SERIOUSLY burst.

credits

released May 31, 2016

Special thanks to Deborah Haynes (who made all of this possible), Johnny and Lisa Brady (for the use of Night Owl Studios), Termite and Cindy Watkins (the best parents a girl could ask for), Locke Brady (who made me a better artist and all-around person), and to anyone who listened to these songs along the way and asked "when will I be able to download this?". Sorry it took so long. You guys are the best.

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Kaitlyn Bethel Houston, Texas

19 year old singer songwriter living in Houston, TX

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